Sunday, October 21, 2007
GEEK ALERT!
became MEGA NERD today and went to study at the melb uni library.
omgosh...YES!!! on a Sunday! there was a lot of people too!
stayed there till like five. until the crazy Indian guy kept saying
sorry but the library is closing 30,15,5min,sorry but you have to leave now, no let me repeat sorry but you have to leave now!( just imagine a weird Indian accent, if you get what i mean. it's not my fault! i cant possibly record and paste here)
omgosh talk abt pushing
and yes, I'm in this crapping mood. thanks to venetia su whom was the
faithful geek that totally looked like she was going to the beach rather than the library to study, that sat with me in the darn library studying for 2hrs before the Indian guy started harping
anw, I've also just been in this i-don't-want-to socialise mood. refusing to go for PS. went ytd for some fund raiser thing for world vision. couldn't take it and went home earlier.
so/too many people!
cannot lar.
i guess i need "me" day again
ppl have been asking me to go for this, go for that
and would just go: "go and die"
in my head
OF COURSE!
I'm too nice to say it
thank you thank you
see! i told you! it's venetia su. bad influence. tsktsktsk
okok...stop Felisha ng
you're old and mature
you need not be influenced by bad company
ANYWAY, back to the go-and-die and refusing-to-socialise thing
ah yar...i guess i just need time for myself i guess
too many events, too little studying,
too much pressure
leave me alone luh
sorry. i mean i cant help it
i know i should go for the darn church camp(which is right smack in my awesome/wonderful and lovely exams) and yes! i know i can go during the weekends for like
only 2 hours (this is where the go and die part comes in)
but the thing is, I'll probably be too tired and falling asleep in the sermon or just worrying and looking at the time, probably charging at the door like some mad bull once the preacher is done.
i also know that i should put God first, before everything but I'm like.......er ok...i dunno.
and i also know that they are just encouraging me and being nice
BUT STOP IT!
please lar...don't push me anymore can..
and i also know that i should be at my lovely friend's baptism today instead of crapping away my precious time.
but just
NO THANKS!
i don't need more crowds
i feel as if everyone wants a piece of me(sounds very...whatever)
but it's true luh
everybody misses me, everybody wants me around
i know this probably sounds very....proud or whatever
but I'm just sick of it lar
i mean it's good that i got friends that want to see me
but it's just plain exhausting at times
i guess i just don't want to hang out in crowds now
a lot of effort is needed in socialising
the thing is i really want to spend time with everybody
but it's so tiring
there's this clique in school whom are my lunch mates on tues and thurs
but i don't spend any/what-so-ever time with them
sometimes not even on both days
the thing is, there's a lot of opportunity and
potential (if you want to call it) in leading them to Christ
but i just don't have the time to get to know them personally
hai...
and yes, i know i will regret it
i will regret not trying to get to know them so that they will become...you know...a christian.
two of them are stagnant Christians
one just accepted a few weeks ago but doesn't want to go to church now
i mean...i see the chance there but i just....i dunno
i think right....if i were to ever leave here anytime/now,
one of the few regrets I'll have is not getting to know them better
fel was shaking her ass at 6:57 PM